Obama Updates His Resume

Posted on January 20, 2017


WASHINGTON, D.C. – After leaving the White House, former President Barack Obama started on his next challenge: landing a new job. But like everyone in this difficult economy, what jobs are available for an executive who was unliked by about half of the people he supervised?


“Should I put on my resume that I was editor of the Harvard Law Journal?” Obama asked career counselor Aaron Richardson, the free consultant at the D.C.-area municipal job center. He informed him he should probably just keep it to one page because most hiring managers don’t have a lot of time.

Richardson said the average length of time at a career is 6.7 years, so Obama stayed with the position of “President” a bit longer than average.

“That should help his chances with recruiters,” he added.

“I’m supposed to put my education, down, right? So, Columbia and Harvard? Or just Harvard? Do you just list your last education? This is so confusing.”

Obama continued to struggle throughout the rest of his half hour appointment, repeatedly asking the consultant whether it was important being a senator in Illinois from 1997 to 2004, or just “stick to the stuff about being president.”

“Huh, I haven’t worked on this in, like, eight years,” Obama said. “Maybe I should move the part about the Nobel Peace Prize to the top.”