Subscribe:
RSS feed
All the news that's fit to read and then be forgotten after seeing a funny video of a kitten
Coming Soon: “United: The Brian Thompson Story”
Universal Pictures has already announced a biopic on Brian Thompson, the CEO of United Healthcare who was gunned down in New York City. The film, “United: The Brian Thompson Story,” will focus on his struggles climbing the corporate ladder in a challenging business climate. Seth Rogen, Jonah Hill, and Chris Pratt are said to be […]
Posted in: Celebrities
Website Rates Celebs On Being Horrible Human Beings
November 12, 2017
HOLLYWOOD, CA – A new website will now list every celebrity so that people can rate them on how horrible they are. RateMyStars.com promises to be pop culture version of such sites as GlassDoor.com, where people who worked with someone can rate them on such behavior as sexual assault, racism, and homophobia. The creators of […]
Posted in: Celebrities, Uncategorized
Reporters Looking Forward To Being Body Slammed By President Rock
July 11, 2017
As an exploratory committee has been formed to determine the likelihood of Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson running for president in 2020, journalists are looking forward to being body slammed by a politician who really knows how to body slam someone. In the wake of Montana Representative Greg Gianforte body slamming a reporter, and President Donald […]
The Case for Betsy DeVos
February 5, 2017
Washington, D.C. – Despite protest, Senate leaders are rallying around Betsy DeVos, President Donald Trump’s pick for Secretary of Education, because they said they are afraid to see what Trump’s second round pick would be. “If this is his best candidate…God, I don’t even want to think about who would be his second-best,” said Sen. […]
Debate Viewers Just Hoping to See Ken Bone
February 2, 2017
WASHINGTON, D.C. – Although CNN is touting the debate over the Affordable Care Act as a rivalry between two powerhouse almost-rans, most people are just tuning in hoping to catch a glimpse of Ken Bone. In one corner, there will be Vermont Senator Bernie “The Aggressive Progressive” Sanders. And in the other corner, Texas Senator […]
Posted in: Politics, Uncategorized
Obama Updates His Resume
January 20, 2017
WASHINGTON, D.C. – After leaving the White House, former President Barack Obama started on his next challenge: landing a new job. But like everyone in this difficult economy, what jobs are available for an executive who was unliked by about half of the people he supervised? “Should I put on my resume that I was […]
Posted in: Politics, Uncategorized
Melania Blinks “Help Me” During Inauguration
January 20, 2017
As First Lady Melania Trump stood by President Donald Trump throughout the inauguration, Morse Code experts noticed a peculiar rhythm to her blinking. “She was definitely communicating via Morse Code,” U.S. Army Communications officer John Caring said. “She was blinking ‘help me’ over and over again.” One White House employee was reported to have heard […]
Canceled Show Planning Spinoff in 20 Years
January 7, 2017
The creators of Girl Meets World, which was cancelled earlier this week, have already begun working on the spinoff, which will debut in 2035. Girl Meets World (2014-2017) features the coming-of-age story of Riley Matthews, daughter of Cory Matthews, star of Boy Meets World (1993-2000). The sequel, Kids Meet World (2035-2036), will feature the […]
2 Billy Crystal Movies Accidentally Released At Same Time
December 29, 2012
Two films that star Billy Crystal are now currently in theaters. The film industry meant to do this with Brad Pitt but made a mistake.
Posted in: Uncategorized
Very Little Knowledge News 
December 7, 2024
0